Dick Tracy: Warren Beatty’s Colorful Overlooked Comic Noir Actioner

By
Emily Stephan
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UAMC Remembers Warren Beatty and the Underappreciated in its Time Dick Tracy (1990).

Dick Tracy is most-known for its underperformance at the box office, sinking what Disney hoped was going to be the next big franchise. Dick Tracy resembles Disney’s other underperforming comic book action juggernaut, The Rocketeer: both take place in the 1930s, draw inspiration from old-movie serials, and feature lively, over-the-top performances from a notable cast. While The Rocketeer has become a cult classic, Dick Tracy remains overlooked, which is a shame, as it’s an exciting movie, both in terms of action and visuals.

Warren Beatty’s Forgotten Legacy

Clean-cut detective Dick Tracy (Warren Beatty, who also directed and produced the film) wages a one-man war against “Big Boy” Caprice (Al Pacino) and his gang of freak-faced mobsters, though he finds it difficult to gather enough definitive evidence to get the man in cuffs. He tries to get Big Boy’s moll, lounge singer Breathless Mahoney (Madonna), to testify against him, but she expresses more interest in seducing the detective than helping him.

Breathless’s advances and the target on Tracy’s back complicates his relationship with Tess Trueheart (Glenne Headley), his sweet-tempered girlfriend who wants him to settle for an office job. Tracy’s also temporarily adopted a street urchin named Kid (Charlie Korsmo), who helps Tracy with his detective work whether he likes it or not. As much as Tracy cares for his small circle of loved ones, he is unwilling to give up his dangerous work for them—especially once they are drawn into the crossfire.

A mysterious, raspy-voiced figure, known as the Blank, manipulates both Tracy and Big Boy. When Tess is eventually endangered by the three-way battle, Tracy must use all his ingenuity to find his way out of a deadly trap.

Was Dick Tracy Good, Bad or Ultimate?

Critics have bemoaned Dick Tracy’s story—or rather, lack of psychological depth in said story—since its release. It’s true that the characters are flat with simple motivations: Tracy wants justice, Tess wants Tracy to commit, Big Boy wants power, Breathless wants Tracy’s love, etc. Due to its aesthetics, I think a lot of critics expected Dick Tracy to share the darker themes of old-school film noir—but then again, this is based on a three-panel comic series, not a Raymond Chandler novel.

Even if the film apes noir tropes and imagery, it is not a noir proper, concerned with ambiguous morality in a world gone wrong. A more appropriate cinematic precursor would be 1930s gangster and G-man films, complete with tommy guns a-blazing, square-jawed cops, and gangsters handing out cement overcoats. Beatty and his team take the 1930s gangster picture into the context of the 1980s/1990s action-thriller, ramping up the carnage big time.

Everything moves at a clip, for the most part: car explosions, shoot-outs, fistfights, daring escapes, attempted seductions, gruesome (by PG standards) gangland killings. These scenes are framed like comic book panels, dynamic and colorful. Then as now, Dick Tracy’s production design impresses with its commitment to evoking the original strip with its basic colors.

Sometimes the story stalls, so enamored of its visual design that it forgets to keep moving forward. It doesn’t really follow a traditional three-act story where the characters change or where the stakes amp up as the plot goes on. Dick Tracy feels more like several episodes of a television show season strung together than a feature. Beatty claims Disney shaved about 10-20 minutes off the movie before its release, but considering how some sections drag and how character development is not the priority of Dick Tracy, I wonder if this might have been for the best. I don’t know if extra footage would make the story more coherent.

Warren Beatty’s Dick Tracy and Excellent Cast

Regardless of the story’s shortcomings, Beatty is great as Dick Tracy. While critics complained he was too old to play a crime-fighting gumshoe at 52, the energetic Beatty looks like he can keep up with the action going on around him, so this is hardly a case of, say, Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. An action hero need not be all rippling muscles to be credible. Beatty also allows Tracy to come off as principled and tough without being one-note.

Beatty is well-supported by a bevy of all-star actors. Glenn Headley is a breath of fresh air as the one subdued member of the cast, the calm in a hurricane of gleefully hammy performances. Charlie Kosmo is charming as Kid, not nearly as annoying as he could have been.

Al Pacino’s bombastic villain will either annoy or delight, depending upon your temperament—as someone who loves over-the-top villains, I adored his performance, which can only be described as a gangster version of Shakespeare’s Richard III. He practically steals the show from everyone else.

Even Madonna, as bemoaned as her acting abilities are, is good as the femme fatale, cynical, seductive, and cunning, with just enough vulnerability to make her memorable.

Considering how Disney wanted this to be a franchise, it’s strange how they shoved sixteen villains into one movie. Their trademark grotesque faces and deformities are brought to life with make-up effects that have held up extremely well, but one might think they’d want to save a few for later films, not to mention with so many villains on display, few get the chance to make much of an impression beyond Big Boy himself.

UAMC Worthy? You Decide!

I found Dick Tracy a more satisfying experience the second time I watched it. Initially, I had the same complaints as the filmmakers, wanting the film to be more like the Tim Burton Batman with its gothic melodrama and troubled hero—considering how the film also features an art deco aesthetic and a similar-sounding score from Danny Elfman, it’s an understandable comparison. (Apparently, even Batman leading lady Kim Basinger was in the line-up for Breathless.)

But one must look at Dick Tracy on its own merits to fully appreciate it as both an action movie and a technical tour-de-force—and it has more than enough merits to make it worthy of a second glance.

What are your thoughts (and memories) on Warren Beatty’s Dick Tracy? Let us know in the comments or on our Facebook page!

Arnold Schwarzenegger Releases Predator-Inspired ‘Dutch Bourbon Whiskey’

By
Jack Beresford
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‘Get to the choppa!’ with this official Predator bourbon whiskey you can enjoy ‘anytime’

Predator fans will soon be drinking to Major Alan Dutch Schaefer’s good health thanks to a tie-in whiskey paying tribute to Arnold Schwarzenegger’s character in the 80s action classic.

Dutch Bourbon Whiskey is the result of a collaboration between Silver Screen Bottling Company and Fox Studios and already looks like a must-buy for action movie fans.

The bottle’s design is the biggest draw, featuring both the familiar Predator targeting crosshairs as well as Dutch’s helicopter and the iconic line: “Get to the chopper.”

Bonus: Read more PREDATOR articles here!

Arnold Schwarzenegger’s Bourbon

According to the marketing material around the new whiskey, this particular bourbon is aimed at people “on a mission with a bold taste for adventure.”

The bourbon offers a full-bodied flavour with notes of vanilla, coconut, and bergamot and, like Arnie himself, packs a hell of a punch at 40% ABV.

While this officially-licensed Predator whiskey can be enjoyed “anytime”, it could make the perfect accompaniment to a night in watching the original Predator.

A UAMC Approved Refreshment

Alternatively, you can use it to drown your sorrows while watching the lamentable follow-up The Predator – so close to being good and yet so far!

In any case, it’s the ultimate tipple for any muscle-bound guys out there looking to enjoy something with a little kick alongside a hearty-looking handshake.

If it Bleeds, We Can Drink it

More importantly, it’s a great whiskey to enjoy as part of a Predator-based drinking game. Just drink anytime someone utters one of the classic lines like:  “If it bleeds, we can kill it,” “I ain’t got time to bleed,” or “Anytime”.

Just go steady though. There are a lot of great quotes in the movie. Dutch Bourbon Whiskey is now available for pre-sale, retailing for $34.99 each.

Are you interested in this Arnold-approved ‘Dutch Bourbon Whiskey’? Let us know in the comments or on our Facebook page!

5 Reasons ‘Raiders of the Lost Ark’ is Absolutely an Ultimate Action Movie

By
Ultimate Action Movies
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We damn sure love us some Indiana Jones in Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981)!

It should go without say that the Harrison Ford 1981’s timeless classic, Raiders of the Lost Ark, was a monumental landmark in the action movie landscape. The stunts. The fights. The infectious score that will have you humming it for weeks after watching, all the while plotting your next big adventure. 

It is Steven Spielberg’s movie-making magic at its very finest, a genre-transcending adventure that is honestly just as enjoyable now as it was in the 80’s. Perhaps the film’s most remarkable feature was its ahead-of-its-time fight sequences, scenes so infectiously influential that to this day, Walt Disney World houses the Indiana Jones Epic Stunt Spectacular! so that audiences can relive the stunts in person. 

Here are 5 reasons why the fight sequences in Raiders of the Lost Ark are still so respected today:

Indiana Jones’ Vulnerability

Unlike most action heroes of the era, Indiana Jones is not a “total badass” in the typical sense of the word. Sure, he daringly stands up for what is right and sticks to his guns, but it never feels like he has the upper-hand when knuckling up with an opponent. Where Schwarzenegger and Van Damme are intimidating figures, more mountains than men, Harrison Ford’s Dr. Jones looks like an average Joe. 

In the majority of the film’s brawls, Indi is actually getting the crap kicked out of him until something fortuitous happens (i.e. a plane’s propeller makes short work of a particularly beefy Nazi mechanic who had been pounding Indi into a pulp). This vulnerability makes Indiana Jones a more relatable action hero, which really puts the audience into his shoes and makes the fight sequences feel larger than life.

The Humor

While Raiders isn’t a comedy by definition, it does have a brilliant sense of humor. Indi’s brash, nonchalant swagger makes him so cool that it’s honestly hilarious when he stumbles or decides to fight dirty, which he actually does so quite frequently throughout the film. 

For example, during the fight in the Egyptian bazaar, Indi faces off with a skilled swordsman. After the man briefly shows off his prowess, Indi gives an “I don’t have time for this” eye roll, then pulls out his gun and indifferently shoots the man in the head. 

By inserting slight-yet-effective doses of humor into the stunts and fight scenes, the audience is reminded that this is, in fact, a movie, and that you are here to have fun.

The Stunts and Special Effects

Explosions! Car chases in the desert! Daring escapes from snake-infested tombs! This movie has arguably more notorious stunts than most films created in the 2000’s, despite the glaring improvements in technology and special effects. For evidence, you need look no further than Raiders’ opening scene, Indi’s infamous attempt to recover a golden idol from an ancient, booby-trapped temple. Even re-watching it today, you will be blown away by its spectacle.

No Damsel-In-Distress Here!

When we are introduced to Maion, Indi’s spurned ex-lover, she is literally out-drinking a man in a Tibetan bar. What a great way to immediately let the audience know that this character, although a woman, is no helpless maiden. 

Marion is Indi’s equal in almost every way, and at no point does the audience feel as though she needs saving, even when she literally “needs saving.” 

When she gets locked in the Nazi plane, she ends up figuring out how to use the plane’s weapons system and guns down an entire vehicle of soldiers. Given the times, it was a risky decision to make the film’s lead actress so independent, but it is a decision that really paid off in the long run.

The Realistic Stakes

Every fight scene in Raiders has a real feel of importance. However, it’s not the kind of movie where the world is at risk. Indiana Jones is simply trying to stop the Nazi’s from taking possession of the Ark of the Covenant, not necessarily because the Nazi’s will use the Ark or its power (as Indi addresses early on, he is skeptical of any supernatural device), but because the US government hired him to get it. 

Because the stakes aren’t so implausibly grandiose, the audience can actually better understand why Indi is risking so much to recover the Ark. In this case, less is actually more.

Although he wasn’t born until 1991, don’t assume this feisty millennial can’t tell Tom Selleck from Tom Cruise. Nick Hemming has long been an action movie aficionado, comic book enthusiast (ONLY Marvel; DC sucks!), and all-around wunderkind. When he isn’t watching movies, he is probably writing about them.

Do you consider Raiders of the Lost Ark to be an ultimate action movie classic? Let us know in the comments!

UAMC Exclusive Look at ‘The Standoff at Sparrow Creek’ (2019)

By
Ultimate Action Movies
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Take a Peek into dark action thriller ‘The Standoff at Sparrow Creek’ in this EXCLUSIVE PHOTO.

It’s a shame The Standoff at Sparrow Creek wasn’t able to slip into release here at the tail end of 2018 as it most definitely would find itself on numerous Top 10 of the Year lists. Still, Sparrow Creek is a seedy powder keg of an action thriller that will definitely blow some tops here in 2019 (release date is Jan 18th, btw).

The Ultimate Action Movie Club first reviewed Sparrow Creek at Fantastic Fest in Austin, Texas last fall. We praised it for being one of the festival’s best action offerings, but the film is really more than your standard modern action fare. It’s definitely more of thriller. It’s darker. It’s more complex. And it’s about emotions. Which may sound gooey, but they’re badass emotions like trust, betrayal and fear.

Written and directed by Henry Dunham and starring an all-star ensemble of broody performances by Patrick Fischler, Brian Geraghty, Chris Mulkey, Happy Anderson, Robert Aramayo, Gene Jones and helmed by James Badge Dale, this look at Sparrow Creek comes to us from the team at Cinestate whose been hard at work recently keeping the ultimate action movie vibe alive with their features Brawl in Cell Block 99 (which you can read about here) and the upcoming Dragged Across Concrete (which you can read our excited review here).

An Exclusive Look at The Standoff at Sparrow Creek

‘As the member’s trust in one another deteriorates, Gannon (L) deflects the spotlight from Ford (R).’ – Henry Dunham

Well, here it is! As you can see above, in this UAMC EXCLUSIVE IMAGE, dark shadows forebode an ultimate showdown between suspicious militia members drawn together to find a rat. Kind of. You’ll have to see it yourself. But in the scene above, James Badge Dale (Gannon, on the left) is working on his fellow militia member Chris Mulkey (Ford, on the right) in their late night rendezvous at militia HQ.

To keep it short, since diving anywhere into the boiler pot plot might give away some spoilers, the official synopsis from Cinestate of the film simply reads:

“A militia man attempts to find the gunman behind a horrific shooting at a police funeral.”

What follows are some of the most intense 90-odd minutes of high tension character-driven suspense which leaves you white knuckled and suspicious of everyone. And while it’s more on the thriller-side of our classic action bread and butter, it is an old school who-dun-it that’s definitely a modern hybrid action-thriller for Ultimate Action Movie Club fans to check out.

Peep the trailer below:

What are your thoughts on how ‘The Standoff at Sparrow Creek’ looks? Let us know in the comments or on our Facebook page!

6 Ultimate Action Stars Who Should Have Starred in John Wick

By
Jourdan Aldredge
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John Wick is awesome, but it’d be awesomer with one of these classic UAMC-era stars!

I’m incredibly embarrassed to admit this, but until a week ago, I never saw John Wick. I’ve also never seen John Wick 2. And I’m on the fence about seeing John Wick 3 whenever that comes out. I wouldn’t say I went out of my way to avoid John Wick though. It looked interesting enough. I love Keanu Reeves for his UAMC classics like Point Break and Speed. I also really like action movies. So it seemed inevitable that I would see it eventually.

However, after John Wick came out in 2013, year after year went by and I still never sat down to watch it. That is until recently, when I finally caved and gave it a rental. (I will caveat that I did see Atomic Blonde at SXSW 2017 – so I knew the style a bit already.)

If I had to give a quick UAMC review, I’d say it was awesome (of course). It had balls-to-the-wall action, it had style, and it had a great hero and a great villain. However, something about it just felt off. It was hyper-violet compared to 80s/90s action movies, but that’s to be expected. I really liked its self-aware plot and pacing, which made it really fly through exposition and get to the good stuff.

It wasn’t until I was reading through the Wikipedia and IMBD about the film and how it came to exist that I was able to put my finger on it. Early on its production, while it was just a script being shopped around, the film had a different title. It was called Scorn and was supposed to star John Wick as a retired hitman as a “a man in his mid-sixties”.

Which really got me thinking… Yes The Expendables and Red explored this old-action-hero-out-of-retirement motif pretty well, but especially for a movie as well produced and punched-up as John Wick, if it truly did star an older action movie veteran (especially if it were a UAMC legend), it could be one of the greatest post-UAMC golden era action movies ever!

So, before I dive into John Wick 2 or JW3 (as I’ve dubbed it), here is a look into what John Wick would have looked like with some different UAMC legends in the starring role.

Steven Seagal

This was the first name that came to mind for me. Let’s not get into any actualities here. Steven Seagal might be a little hard to wrangle in for a project like this – most of his ventures seemed focused on running for office in Russia and opening his own winery these days. But for a nice mix of martial arts and small to mid firearms prowess, Seagal certainly fits the bill. Plus, for a beruffled retired hitman, seeing a large-and-in-charge Seagal running down thugs in a club would be pretty awesome.

Plus! With Seagal’s strong Russian ties these days, the whole plot point of him being a retired favorite of a Russian crime world kingpin would actually be pretty on the nose. Seagal would love speak his tough guyism in Russian throughout the film.

Jean-Claude Van Damme

My second personal choice for the role of John Wick would have to be Jean-Claude Van Damme. The man has shown that he still wants to work lately! I mean, really, really want to work. From Jean Claude Van Johnson (great show, rest in peace!), to his latest French action thriller The Bouncer, to a (small) role in the latest Kickboxer, to rumors of a Universal Soldier reboot, to whatever he’s hawking in those tortilla chip commercials, the man is not currently anything down.

In John Wick, Van Damme would be at the right age, but also still in the near peak fitness level needed to do pretty much anything Keanu pulls off. Heck, Van Damme could probably still do more. Contractually, Van Damme would need to have his signature split kick included (as well as apparently a gratuitous butt shot as well.)

From there, Van Damme would kill at the stoic killing machine face which for Keanu only makes him look like he’s about to fart or cry. Van Damme would go about his business methodically and with more high flying precision.

Chuck Norris

Not sure if this would as Chuck Norris is now 78 years old, but if he could have physically done it, would absolutely have loved to see Chuck Norris as John Wick. Keanu does some pretty gnarly hand-to-hand fighting, but that was never Chuck’s style.

A Chuck Norris fight usually only had three hits: Chuck’s boot to the bad guy’s face, the bad guy hitting the ground, then Chuck Norris whipping out a slide guitar and singing a little ditty about why it’s important that kids stay in school.

The scene in John Wick where the kingpin bad guy learns that Wick is on his case so he immediately informs his henchmen that they’re all already dead would hit so much harder if John Wick was Chuck Norris. He might as well be like, “Chuck Norris is pissed at us, we’re all dead” then a cowboy boot smacks him in the temple through the phone.

Dolph Lundgren

Now these are some personal choices which I’d selfishly would enjoy. Dolph Lundgren has proved that he’s still a very action movie capable villain. His work in Creed 2 reprising his iconic role as Ivan Drago was one of the highlights of the film (and maybe even the entire Rocky saga). But I’ve always loved him as a hero – most notably in Masters of the Universe and Showdown in Little Tokyo.

He also might be one of the most believable old-timers to actually fit the just-got-married plot setup at the beginning. Unlike the other stars, he does seem personable and relatable enough to actually get married, which would really sell it when the heartbreak hits and he must get vengeance.

Wesley Snipes

I don’t know what Wesley Snipes does these days, but I miss him and would love to see him on the action movie screen again. If it did work out, John Wick would have been a pretty awesome way to re-introduce himself to the action movie scene. Almost as if the whole “retired to get married and support my dying wife” subplot at the beginning would just replace Snipes’ actual “I went to prison for tax fraud” life narrative.

Brian Bosworth

Brian Bosworth, if you’re reading this, you need to make another action movie! Soon! I’m a big fan of The Boz, and generally really loved his action movie exploits like Stone Cold (which you can read about here) and One Man’s Justice (which you can read about here).

I also really felt for him in the ESPN 30-for-30 documentary about him and how he’s atoned for his outlandish past to become a pretty grounded guy and great father.

He’s also starred in a tongue-in-cheek advertising campaign by Dr. Pepper about a college football town (sorry non-USA readers), that leaves me always wanting to see him take another stab at the action movie world. John Wick – or something similar – would be a great vehicle for him to flex his action chops once again in a tight story that doesn’t require any serious acting. Just badass action!

Have any other action movie legends that you’d love to see in a John Wick-style role? Let us know your thoughts in the comments or on our Facebook page!

Robocop (2014): The PG-13 Robocop Remake No One Wanted

By
Emily Stephan
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An ultimately harmless and forgettable remake to the great Robocop original.

Ultimate action movie enthusiasts around the world likely let out a collective groan when announcements of a Robocop remake sprung up all over the internet. And why shouldn’t they have? The original movie was a classic. So what if it’s dated to the 1980s—good storytelling has no expiration date and many of the problems Paul Verhoeven satirizes are still relevant in our time.

But Hollywood had its way and we got a Robocop remake. A PG-13 Robocop remake. Apparently, no one learned anything from Robocop 3, which saddled Robocop with largely bloodless fight scenes (both literally and figuratively)—though thank heaven, we aren’t saddled with an annoying kid protagonist or an entirely incompetent Robocop.

Before we dive in, take a moment to read our UAMC reviews of the original Robocops.

A Fourth Robocop Film

In 2028, international conglomerate OmniCorp creates peacekeeping robots to send overseas. They want to implement their technology within the US, but controversy over the lack of a human element in these machines (which resulted in accidental deaths in the Middle East) has led to a polarized response from Americans.

Meanwhile, Detroit cop Alex Murphy (Joel Kinnaman) gets critically injured when a bomb is planted in his car by a local drug-lord’s lackeys. Able to convince his distraught wife (Abbie Cornish) to give them permission to operate on him, OmniCorp turns him into Robocop. Now they have their mechanical peacekeeper and a “human element,” though a chip in Robocop’s hardwiring keeps his free will under the control of the company, unbeknownst to the general public or Murphy himself.

And then… the film kind of meanders. A lot of attention is given to the cybernetics of the Robocop suit, the question of how much free will he does or does not have, how the bypass of his empathy affects his relationship with his family—though none of these things are ever explored in as much depth as they warrant. There is no hunt for vengeance or much of a quest element at all.

All of the Robocop Movies Ranked From Best to Worst

Why Too Serious?

At any rate, it definitely would not fit UAMC standards as an action movie. It’s a movie that almost seems embarrassed to bear the name “Robocop,” so seriously does it take itself, very much in The Dark Knight mode with its aesthetics and the way it handles action scenes.

Many times, the movie seems to be going for something more realistic in tone—until it suddenly doesn’t, for this is an action film with an identity crisis. Does the new Robocop want to be an over-the-top experience like the original or does it wish to cleave to a grittier approach? The film never settles on one or the other, making it a tonal mess at times.

Take the first time we see Robocop in action, shooting down robotic adversaries in a demonstration of his abilities, rock music blaring, informing us that yes, this is fun and awesome in the vein of an Iron Man movie. The problem? These scenes almost trick you into thinking the movie is capturing the irreverent humor of the original, but then later on, we get scenes ripped straight out of modern war movies or police thrillers, scenes as far from the tone of “awesome movie action” as you can get. Once again, there is nothing wrong with a grittier tone—but the filmmakers should have picked one or the other.

5 Things to Know About the Latest Robocop Reboot

The Bloodless Robocop

Robocop ’14 also has to be one of the most bloodless remakes of all time—and I’m not just talking the PG-13 rating… though that’s a problem too. Everything seems so stock and rote. The antagonists aren’t interesting, even with fine actors like Michael Keaton and Gary Oldman in the roles.

Keaton’s OmniCorp CEO in particular is a disappointment as a Big Bad: he has no personal beef with Murphy but nor does he have much reason to turn against him, which, predictably, he and OmniCorp indeed do. In fact, the villains don’t have too much of a reason to hate Robocop, as he never goes so boldly against his directives as he did in the original. When they go after him and his family, it just feels like a way of giving the movie a decent climactic confrontation and not as a natural culmination of conflict.

Matters aren’t helped with the wife and son lacking distinctive personalities, despite having a good chunk of screen-time. The same could be said of the wife and kid in the original Robocop, true, but they were present only peripherally and served as a reminder of what Murphy had lost in becoming a cyborg. They were more symbols than characters, which is clearly not the intention in the reimagining.

Alex Murphy is far less likable in both guises. Murphy is less the warm family man and more a scowling smartass who doesn’t even seem to have much warmth towards his family even in his brief pre-accident interactions with them. He retains his memories, making the loss of his humanity less affecting. He doesn’t undergo an alteration of personality when he becomes Robocop either. The sum total of these elements means that the transition from man to mechanical product leaves less of an impact.

COPYCATS! Robocop (1987) vs. Robo Vampire (1988)

When Robocop Became Harmless

Overall, it feels less inspired too. Robocop ‘87 took from westerns, science fiction, and the Bible, creating a unique vibe that elevated it above standard revenge-action schlock. Robocop ‘14 takes from contemporary political thrillers and The Dark Knight—not nearly as rich a reservoir. As a result, it feels more derivative and generic.

I know a common rule in reviewing remakes is to forget the original exists and to evaluate the new movie on its own merits, but my problem with this remake is that it doesn’t do much to distinguish itself. It’s not interesting enough to make me forget the unforgettable original. Compare this to other remakes, like John Carpenter’s The Thing, which is successful because it picks a different direction from the 1950s original and then sticks with it. No tonal flip-flopping.

Whatever. The remake is harmless. Forgettable, but harmless. We’ll always have Verhoeven.

What are your thoughts on the Robocop Remake (2014)? Let us know in the comments or on our Facebook page!

Sylvester Stallone’s Top 5 Movies About Arm Wrestling Truck Drivers

By
Jourdan Aldredge
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The most ‘OVER THE TOP’ arm wrestling truck driver action movies by Sylvester Stallone!

Over the Top
Sylvester Stallone in Over the Top (1987).

The great Sylvester Stallone has a pretty ultimate action movie career. However, if there is any action movie sub-genre in which Sly really shines, it’s the father-son truck-driving arm-wrestling tournament epic. If you’d like to see our REGULAR list of the best Sylvester Stallone action movies – then this is the article for you.

BUT, if you’re here to see our list of the most ultimate arm wrestling truck driving action movies by Sylvester Stallone, then check out our Top 5 selections below.

Rambo 5: Last Blood: Everything About Stallone’s Final Rambo Performance

5) Over the Top (1987)

While not his quite his greatest arm wrestling truck driver movie, Over the Top (1987) is really a Sylvester Stallone classic. This movie has it all. Truck driving. Arm wrestling. A whiny kid. A rich grandfather. A dying mother who looks like David Bowie. You name it. Over the Top has it!

4) Over the Top (1987)

Another solid Sylvester Stallone arm wrestling truck driving action movie, Over the Top (1987) is a great example of just how versatile of an actor Stallone really is.

In this Cannon Films classic, Stallone shines as Lincoln Hawk, a blue collared truck driving American who just wants what we all want – our son back.

And how do you get him back? Well you bootstrap yourself up and kidnap him for a rough and tumble cross country road adventure where you can make up for lost time and be the ultimate father in which you’re truly meant to be!

The 10 Best Sylvester Stallone Ultimate Action Movies!

3) Over the Top (1987)

In a somewhat surprise selection here at number 3, Over the Top (1987) is an underappreciated Sylvester Stallone truck driving arm wrestling vehicle that really hits on all cylinders. Not only does Over the Top have some great car chases and fight scenes, it also has the most balls-to-the-wall arm wrestling tournaments put to film.

2) Over the Top (1987)

Now to the real good stuff, released in 1987 by Cannon Films, Over the Top was actually directed by Menahem Golan himself!

Sylvester Stallone captivated audiences in the story of a long-haul truck driver who tries to win back his alienated son while becoming a champion arm wrestler.

It truly is some of Stallone’s most heartfelt work and vastly overshadows his Rocky and Rambo efforts in terms of its truck driving and arm wrestling scenes.

How Sylvester Stallone Shaped the History of Action Movies with Rocky (1976)

1) Over the Top (1987)

That’s right. You read us right! Our number 1 most ultimate truck driving arm wrestling Sylvester Stallone action movie is none other than – OVER THE TOP (1987)!

Where to begin… Cinema itself has never known a movie to pack more badass ultimateness into one picture.

From the scenic opening montage of Sylvester Stallone driving his truck up a mountain to the awe-inspiring ending where Stallone gets back his son (and his NEW TRUCK) by winning the most ferocious arm wrestling tournament ever, OVER THE TOP is the Citizen Kane of Sylvester Stallone arm wrestling truck driving action movies! Period.

What’s your pick for the most ultimate arm wrestling truck driver Sylvester Stallone action movie? Let us know in the comments or on our Facebook page!

Robocop 3: Not the Worst Sci-Fi Action Movie Ever

By
Emily Stephan
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Robocop 3’s Failed Attempt to Live Up to Its Sci-Fi Action Legacy

Robocop 3 is a movie that largely inspires dread and loathing from the very mention of it. I would love to say this reaction is undeserved, that Robocop 3 is a misunderstood classic.

It’s not. It’s an undignified end to the original Robocop saga that will give you a major case of secondhand embarrassment for all involved.

However, I do want to be fair, so I’ll acknowledge two things that are often considered “bad” in this movie that really aren’t terrible.

Before we dive in, take a moment to read our UAMC reviews of Robocop 1 and Robocop 2 first:

Robert John Burke Takes His Turn

One, Robert John Burke playing Robocop. No, he isn’t Peter Weller. Yes, Weller owns this role. However, Burke does as good as anyone else could with this sewage plant of a screenplay.

Two, Otomo. The idea of Robocop fighting what is basically a samurai Terminator is silly, sure, but with the right execution could have been fun in a ridiculously awesome way—you know, kind of like a movie about a robot cop is awesome with the right execution. But what they did in Robocop 3 was not the right context. It might be ridiculous, but it isn’t awesome.

Why? Let me count the ways, starting with the “plot.”

All of the Robocop Movies Ranked From Best to Worst

Robocop Returns… Again!

Omni Consumer Products has been bought out by Kanemitsu, which is basically the Japanese OCP. Intent on getting their plans for the utopic Delta City underway, OCP has plans to demolish the slummy part of Detroit, much to the consternation of the inhabitants. Armed forces known as the Urban Rehabilitators, led by the ruthless John McDaggett (John Castle), seek to clear out or kill any homeless they encounter to speed up the process.

Nikko (Remy Ryan), a child prodigy with computers, is a victim of the Urban Rehabilitators. Losing her parents to their brutality, she finds shelter with a group of homeless who have banded together to form a resistance movement, living in the sewers and bombing OCP property.

Then Robocop (Robert John Burke) gets drawn into the battle when all four of his directives come into conflict. (Even though his directives were allegedly erased completely in Robocop 2, but Robocop 3 laughs at continuity.)

COPYCATS! Robocop (1987) vs. Robo Vampire (1988)

Robocop 3: An Ultimate Mess

Robocop 3 cannot be said to have a plot so much as a series of underdeveloped threads which lead to nothing. Robocop’s character development was pretty much over after the first movie, though the second film at least attempted some further exploration of his personality. Robocop 3 doesn’t care. Though technically the film has a ticking clock element, the suspense is nil. Characters are content to stand around, talk, and pick their noses while mayhem reigns.

The first Robocop had two of the greatest villains in modern action cinema. Robocop 2 had a villain with potential who was underused, but nevertheless got a cool final battle. Robocop 3 cannot be bothered to give us even a central villain, throwing out mostly unmemorable baddies.

Rip Torn is the new OCP president. He makes no impression beyond A) he’s greedy and B) he resents being bought out by a Japanese company. I don’t think he has more than twenty minutes of screen-time and even that might be generous. His shouting is entertaining though.

Bruce Locke is Otomo, the Kanemitsu robot assassin. He’s pretty cool with his collected demeanor, sunglasses, and swordplay. He could have made an interesting nemesis with more screen-time. And character development. And a decent confrontation with Robocop (we’ll get to THAT mess later).

Mako is the Kanemitsu president. He has even less screen-time than Torn and that makes me most sad. How do you have Mako in a movie and just not use him?!

The most prominent of the villains is McDaggett (John Castle). Unfortunately, he is the least interesting, just your run-of-the-mill “mwahaha I’m the English bad guy.”

5 Things to Know About the Latest Robocop Reboot

Badass License Revoked

While some accuse Robocop 2 of trying to appeal to children with the nasty Hob character and looting little league team, I still say that film’s use of kid characters was meant to highlight how innocence is inevitably warped within a violent culture.

Here, the little kid Nikko is definitely there as an audience avatar for the youngsters. She’s cutesy in a way that just feels wrong for the setting. She’s also rather useless despite being a super genius who can reprogram an ED-209 to be as loyal as a puppy… by literally typing “loyal as a puppy” as a command into its system.

ED-209 isn’t the only character who got its badass license revoked either. Robocop himself is suddenly a much clumsier fighter. The punishment he takes from enemies is cringeworthy to watch, not because you feel scared for the character, but because you don’t buy that he’d so easily be taken down by these villains. In the first Robocop, it took the whole Detroit police force or heavy machinery to bring Robocop to his knees. Now it feels like a feather could kill him.

The Most Villainous Bad Guys in Ultimate Action Movie History

Robocop 3’s Unrealized Action Potential

Take the battle between Otomo and Robocop. This should have been AWESOME. Instead, Robocop literally stands there and lets this guy pummel him. It’s one thing to be taken by surprise—but this happens TWICE IN A ROW. And then Robocop just lets Otomo chop him up, sitting there stupefied like this is a slapstick comedy routine. And then he lets himself get knocked over again before finally just shooting the guy. It’s a fight both boring and embarrassing—a microcosm of the whole movie, really.

I didn’t even get into everything wrong with Robocop 3, like the pathetic killing-off of Officer Lewis or the terrible supporting performances. At the very least, Basil Poledouris is back to score the movie, resurrecting the themes from the original film. Unfortunately, it only makes the contrast between the epic music and subpar content all the greater.

But it all gets down to one thing: nobody wants a kid-friendly Robocop. The appeal of Robocop is that delicious blend of biting satire and over-the-top action. By trying to appeal to everyone, Robocop 3 appeals to just about no one.

Luckily, Hollywood never EVER made the mistake of producing a PG-13 Robocop ever again.

…Right?

What are your thoughts on Robocop 3? Let us know in the comments or on our Facebook page!

UAMC Review: The Ultimately Awesome ‘Commando Ninja’ (2018)

By
John Acquavita
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There Can Be Only One Commando Ninja!

As an action movie lover (I prefer the term aficionado), Commando Ninja is a project near and dear to my heart. I had heard of it earlier this year, and when I saw its trailer for the first time on Kickstarter, I knew immediately I had to fund it. With this 65-minute movie, Ben Combes successfully combined elements of popular 1980s Hollywood action movies and created what I feel is an independent cinematic masterpiece.

“Fifty percent commando. Fifty percent ninja. One hundred percent American!”

With those words, spoken in the vein of the late Don LaFontaine, the trailer instantly lets viewers know what they’re in for: action, action, and more action! And thus, we here at The Ultimate Action Movie Club loved it!

Bonus: here is our UAMC interview with creator Ben Combes!

The ULTIMATE Commando Ninja

Because it’s a new release (available now on YouTube – check the end of the article!), I don’t want to include too many spoilers. I can tell you that Commando Ninja has obvious (but well-done) homages to the following 1980s-era action heavyweights: Commando; American Ninja; Predator; Rambo: First Blood Part II; Kickboxer, Bloodsport, Terminator and Kung Fury. That’s a lot of testosterone!

It’s not hard to figure where those influences fall into place when you read its plot: John Hunter, a Vietnam veteran living alone in Canada, is informed by his former commanding officer that his ex-wife was murdered and his daughter kidnapped. Caring not so much about the former (but infinitely more about the latter), John must unleash Hell on Earth to rescue his daughter and right the wrongs — the only way he knows how!

Eric Carlesi absolutely knocks it out of the park in his portrayal of John Hunter. With a shooting schedule that started and stopped according to how much funding backers donated, I know he worked incredibly hard in the gym to get a chiseled physique and achieve the Rambo/Matrix/Dutch look. 

Everything Action Fans Could Want

Commando Ninja includes everything fans of the action genre from the 1980s love: an invincible protagonist; scores upon scores of massacred nameless/faceless antagonists; pithy one-liners; an incredibly well-done synth soundtrack; time travel; and more!

Combes carefully picked and chose which elements fans would instantly recognize and appreciate. There’s a reason guys (and some gals) our age re-watch classic action movies from our youth that we hold near and dear our heart. It has nothing to do with knowing what will happen, but rather the sum of the parts. It’s these parts that if separated from the movie are great by themselves; when they’re merged as parts of the movie, they combine to make it fantastic!

In addition, whereas Kung Fury was a one-hit wonder, Combes has chosen to continue the Commando Ninja brand in multiple formats: a DVD/Blu-Ray; a comic book; toys; t-shirts; and posters. I work in marketing and have to tip my hat to him: he knows how to brand a product!

I would remiss to exclude that the movie was filmed by foreign speakers and English dialogue was dubbed post-production. Rest assured, it did absolutely nothing to take away from what I feel is easily one of 2018’s best action flicks. On the contrary, I think it’s all part of the movie’s charm.

Check it Out Yourself

Commando Ninja is beyond fantastic, and it’s not a modern update to the genre — but that’s a very good thing. It’s something that could just as easily fit in among the aforementioned movies on a neighborhood video store shelf in suburban America during the Reagan administration. That’s the highest praise I can give it. It was written, produced and made by an 80s action movie fan for action movie fans. If you’re reading this review, I strongly suspect that’s you!

So log on to YouTube and check it out for yourself. You won’t be disappointed.

Did you see Commando Ninja in its entirety yet? Let us know your thoughts in the comments or on our Facebook page!

COPYCATS! Batman (1989) vs. Black Scorpion (1995)

By
Ultimate Action Movies
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Tim Burton’s Batman (1989) takes on its ultimate COPYCAT Black Scorpion (1995)!

We have ourselves another ultimate showdown between Tim Burton’s Batman (1989) and the B-movie rip-off Black Scorpion (1995) in this edition of COPYCATS! (Check out past episodes on Lethal Weapon vs LA Vice, The Fugitive vs. Fugitive X, and RoboCop vs. RoboVampire)

Copycats is a bimonthly column about popular action movies and the low-budget films they inspire. Each column, we take a popular action movie and find its cinematic doppelganger, revel in their similarities and dissect their differences. Some of these copycats are good enough (or strange enough) to earn their place in action movie history, but most are being chronicled here to preserve their existence – for better or for worse.

Batman (1989) vs. Black Scorpion (1995)

Original Film: Batman, 1989, starring Michael Keaton and Jack Nicholson, directed by Tim Burton

Copycat: Black Scorpion, 1995, starring Joan Severance and Garrett Morris, directed by Jonathan Winfrey

Synopsis of both films: In a crime-ridden major metropolitan city, only one masked hero – with a really cool car – can keep the city safe from a criminal mastermind.

Copycat Comparison:

Until 1989, most non-comic-book-reading people knew batman as the Caped Crusader portrayed on the cheesy 1960s serial starring Adam West and Burt Ward or as a member of the animated Super Friends. Director Tim Burton, fresh off directing Beetlejuice (1988) and Pee-wee’s Big Adventure (1985), was given the task of bringing Batman to the big screen. His version (which made the fanboys and fangirls go nuts) was much darker, much more action driven, and completely devoid of the cartoony cheesiness common viewers had come to expect from Batman and his Boy Wonder.

With a budget of $35 million (which seems crazy by today’s standards) Burton’s Batman was a huge hit – grossing $411 million worldwide and spawning a number of sequels and imitators. One such copycat was Black Scorpion. 

Produced by B-Movie Behemoth Roger Corman – who is credited for coming up with the idea after saying to writer Craig Nevius that he “wanted to do a female Superman-Spiderman-Batman” – Black Scorpion premiered as part of his Roger Corman Presents series on Showtime. You see, kids, back in the day, movie channels didn’t spend hundreds of millions on creating original content, they spent a large portion of their meager budgets on the broadcast rights of movie blockbusters – which they premiered during primetime – and the rest was used to either purchase or produce low-budget fare to fill the rest of the schedule. And, if you’re reading this column, you were probably up at about 3 a.m. religiously watching these “filler” movies.

Back to Black Scorpion. Starring former model Joan Severance [No Holds Barred (1988) and Bird on the Wire (1990)], Black Scorpion does share some similarities to Batman – albeit low-rent homages to the blockbuster – including:

  • Both Batman and Black Scorpion are alter egos of prominent citizens (Bruce Wayne, a millionaire philanthropist, and Darcy Walker, a cop)
  • Both have a backstory that involves the death of a parent
  • Both have no actual super powers, but have access to super-powered technology
  • Both have really cool cars, black costumes and identifying accessories (Batman has the utility belt while Black Scorpion has a taser ring)
  • Both face off against villains with man-made deformities (Batman had the Joker, a maniacal clown, and Black Scorpion had Breathtaker, an asthmatic baddie trying to steal the air – which, as I write it, sounds like something The Simpsons’ Mr. Burns would do). 
  • Both have a tech guy (Batman has Alfred and, of course, a ton of money, while Black Scorpion has a former car thief/car-pimper-upper Argyle (the always funny Garrett Morris)
  • Both kind of reveal themselves to a love interest – Batman to Vicki Vale (Kim Basinger) and Black Scorpion to her police partner Michael Russo (Bruce Abbott). Side note, Black Scorpion reveals her secret identity during sex, so Russo is really the winner in this faceoff.

Remember when Corman said he “wanted to do a female Superman-Spiderman-Batman?” Well, he did, pretty much exactly. The difference being he probably did it for one thirty-fifth of Batman’s budget, or less.

Also, like Batman, Black Scorpion was followed by a sequel, Black Scorpion II: Aftershock (1996), and a reboot/tv series, Black Scorpion (2001, with Michelle Lintel in the lead).

Which is better?

Black Scorpion. SURPRISE! You see, I’ve always found Burton’s Batman to be kind of boring. Like everyone else in 1989, I saw it in the movie theatre, and it was fine. But during a summer that also had the release of the third Indiana Jones, the second Ghostbusters and Lethal Weapon, Road House, The Abyss and two other underwater movies, Kickboxer, UHF and Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure, Batman was literally the dark horse.

It looked great back in 1989, but it was also dim and moody. In my humble opinion, Batman Returns (1992), is a much more enjoyable movie (primarily because it looks like Burton allowed himself to have a little fun), and Christopher Nolan’s Dark Knight trilogy captured Batman’s character better – keeping the mood dark without dimming the lights.

Black Scorpion is a Roger Corman movie. It’s not trying to be anything other than a knockoff, and there’s satisfaction in that. It’s an easy watch, especially Joan Severance … I know, probably not supposed to say that anymore, but Severance is a beautiful woman who kicks butt wearing a tight black outfit with thigh-high boots, so, cut me some slack! Its low-rent imitations of big-budget Batman adds to the enjoyment, as does Garrett Morris. It’s a fun movie, and it’s better than Batman. There, I said it, and I don’t care what you think!

Article by Eric LaRose – a Wisconsin-based connoisseur of action, horror and sci-fi movies from the ‘80s and ‘90s. A former journalist and podcaster, Eric wrote the ending to the Toxic Avenger Part 4, but the only person who will back up that claim is his wife.

What are your thoughts on this Batman v Black Scorpion showdown? Let us know in the comments or on our Facebook page!

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