The Barbarian Brothers in the role they were born to play is Cannon Films greatest triumph of disappointment.
I’m too far in at this point. I honestly can’t decide on the concepts of “good” or “bad” in regards to film these days. Do I love bad movies because they’re secretly good, or do I hate good movies because they’re secretly bad? I’m too far gone by this point to get my head around a film like The Barbarians. It’s a beautiful, awful trainwreck of an action movie that is both a huge disappointment and a masterpiece at the same time.
Cannon Films, in all of its ultimate flame-out glory, really outdid itself with this one. Yet, as is the case with Conan the Barbarian or any other similar film of this golden 80s/90s action era, it’s entirely not surprising in the least. The Barbarian twins, with their classic wrestling persona shticks, are in perfect contrast with a film of the scale and scope that – if it were released today – would give Mad Max Fury Road a run for its money in terms of production quality… In one scene, but then not the next.
So, hang with me while my brain melts trying to decipher if The Barbarians deserves to be remembered as the crowning achievement of Cannon Films’ ultimate filmography, or if it should be buried deep under its long enshrined casket.
Ok, to be upfront and completely fair I do have to say that I love the Barbarian Brothers. I love the fact that they exist and that we have cinematic evidence of just how ridiculous yet likeable they were on screen. (I have to speak past-tense about them though as David Paul sadly passed away in March 2020, yet their legacy will forever shine ultimate and bright.) And I love the fact they’re real ultimate action cinematic introduction is The Barbarians – where we get to see two scrawny boys grow up into Schwarzenegger-esque bodybuilders through one swift flashback.
Also, in a world of fantasy and make-believe where they grow up in confinement being whipped and lifting rocks, they also develop sharp lipped Brooklyn accents and street-smart sass that you’d normally only develop from years of watching Ninja Turtles cartoons.
And, despite the obvious flaws, redundancies and idioteque nature of their characters, it absolutely works. If they were anything else I would turn the movie off right away, but they’re simply the best. If anything The Barbarians fails them by not finding magical ways to make their schtick fit within the beautiful mess that is the film.
All that being said, it doesn’t work in this film at all. Yet, also, it does. Again, I don’t understand it. These two Ninja Turtle wannabes are from Brooklyn, but also they’re orphaned nomads who have grown up in captivity in a fantasy hellscape world which has set pieces bigger and more lavish than anything Arnold ever starred in when he was starting out.
The sword and sorcery world is established early with a very long and in-depth intro sequence that sees our good guy performing gypsies get captured and ambushed by the evil tyrant Kadar played stubbornly by Richard Lynch. We also have a motherly queen Canary played by Virginia Bryant and a beautiful and sisterly sidekick played by an up-and-coming Eva La Rue.
The rest of the cast and crew appear to be non-English speaking Italian actors tasked with matching styles and performers with a mix of trained American actors plus… you know, the Barbarian brothers doing their bash bros routines. And again, it’s a mess and it bogs in every scene which can only be saved by some beautiful landscapes, fantastic sets and AGAIN, the Barbarian Brothers.
So, the crux of my issues with the film simply come down to whether or not it’s ultimate and – frankly – if I like it or not. I do like it I think, but I also think it’s awful. It can be very hard to get to at points. The film spends a great deal of time setting up this fantastical world with its long sword and sorcery opening that leads up to the odd, yet great, yet faulty reveal that the stars of the film are the brothers.
From there, we do get to finally go one some adventures with the duo as they battle dragons and cave creatures and evil sorcerers, the whole time launching as many knucklehead jokes as they can cram into every line of dialogue. And it’s funny! Their jokes seldom land where they’re supposed to but damned if they don’t land where it’s the most enjoyable to hear.
The fights are big, if not the best choreographed. But from a first film for these action stars you wouldn’t quite expect much more. Perhaps the worst, or saddest, part of watching the whole film is simply realizing that, as it so obviously flails and fails on screen, this is why the Barbarian Brothers would never quite become a thing – instead to be cast off as a Cannon Films joke rather than celebrated as a Cannon Films triumph to be remembered with the likes of Arnold and Van Damme. Instead, we’re left with this beautiful career ending and defining mess that is The Barbarians.
Exploring the ultimate cinematic risks of this unheralded action classic!
I write the title to this piece as a statement, but it’s more of an argument. I hope that of all the people that read this someone will offer evidence that this is not true, because we need more films like Universal Soldier: Day of Reckoning. The closest approximation I can think of is The Terminator. Cumulative internet chatter has gradually opened up to the idea of Terminator as an implacable boogeyman pursuing Sarah Connor to punish her for something that hasn’t happened yet, a deed that will have epic consequences in the distant future. Horror through a Kafka filter, physically represented in the skeletal hardness of the machine with a skullhead’s grin and LED red eyes.
But even Terminator doesn’t have the harrowing, relentlessly hostile worldview of this fourth, and so far, final installment of the Universal Soldier franchise. We’re also deceived by the marketing. I don’t remember any marketing for this movie on initial release, but the poster would have you believe that Deveraux and Scott are the stars in this film. Jean-Claude Van Damme and Dolph Lundgren actually play supporting characters and have very limited screentime. The film is carried on the broad and capable shoulders of Scott Adkins (Boyka Undisputed, Hard Target 2, etc.) In the hands of director John Hyams (son of filmmaker Peter Hyams), Universal Soldier undergoes a radical transformation. While retaining the basic underpinnings of resuscitated Vietnam veterans being repurposed for counter-terrorism, Hyams and his collaborators bring a level of mythology and world building that is both exciting and terrifying. There’s a gritty, high tech-low-life cinematic combo to Day Of Reckoning and Regeneration, the previous film, that places the franchise in a Venn diagram of military sci-fi and cyberpunk.
Film fans debate the merits of daring, risk-taking independent cinema versus predictable studio product. Day Of Reckoning serves a great example to support this argument. There’s fight scenes that display unrestrained brutality. The sex scenes, usually designed to give you cheap thrills in typical action films, also have an underlying violence to them. This is a world where primal needs are demanded with force, but it takes a little while to get there. The first few minutes of Day Of Reckoning start in domestic bliss. A little girl wants her daddy to look for monsters in the house. A complying father leaves the comfort of his bed and his stunning wife to investigate. There’s a few seconds of spatial disorientation, till we realize we are seeing things from dad’s POV. This is a camera trick rarely used in action movies because it’s considered anti-cinematic. From the very first shot Day Of Reckoning challenges our assumptions of what is cinematic. John Hyams uses this POV shot to replicate the drowsy state of a man recently wakened, moving through the house room by room, to suddenly be thrown into the horror of a home invasion. Masked men stand idly in the kitchen staring at John (Adkins.) And now we’re helplessly locked into John’s POV as they proceed to beat him with crowbars, over and over, displaying savage glee in their work, before bringing his wife and daughter to the now blood-spattered kitchen to murder them execution-style.
We get a little breather after this opening where John recovers from the attack, and we absorb the fact that it was Deveraux (JCVD) who perpetrated the assault and murder, and we know were in a very different place from the first Universal Soldier. In the opening minutes of the movie we have been treated to a daring re-imagining that might have never happened if Carolco, the original holder of the rights to the Universal Soldier property, hadn’t gone bankrupt. The road to this revitalized Universal Soldier didn’t happen in a straight line. After Skyvision Entertainment acquired the rights to the property from Carolco, what came from this were two made-for-TV movies that feature neither JCVD nor Dolph. Two films I haven’t seen, so I won’t go into them here. These were followed by Universal Soldier: The Return (1999.) The path leading to Reckoning draws parallels to the current schizophrenic state of the movie industry with regards to remakes/reboots/re-imaginings. In The Return they make the highly questionable decision to make Deveraux human again, complete with a wife and daughter. I’m not getting into how a corpse from the Vietnam era was reanimated to the point where he could reproduce, but you see my point. Verisimilitude has its limits. A reanimated corpse from the Vietnam era turned into a supersoldier is no more believable, but when you couch this idea with big explosions, big guns, and badass action, it goes over easier than a corpse with no skills other then killing suddenly having to support a family. That’s good material for an action comedy.
Lucky for us, in Regeneration and Day Of Reckoning, the filmmakers disregardanything that was done with the property after the first Universal Soldier. Hyams and his team are as remorseless with the source material as this current generation of UniSols. This secret army of the dead, maintained in ice coffins and released from their cold sleep for the purpose of removing life from the planet for a society that doesn’t appreciate them, now has a purpose. The UniSols embrace their outcast status, their superior combat skills, and go about gathering themselves unto one mind and one cause.
But we don’t learn this right away. First comes the quiet period of recovery for John after the home invasion and assault. The calm before the storm. In this time of convalescence and grief, John receives a call from a friend, having a sudden need to tell John things. As it always happens in pre-arranged meetings in mysteries, John’s friend is dead by the time John connects with him. He’s left behind a small clue that leads John to a strip club, and from there we follow John into a downward spiral of sleeper agents, complete with government-funded black books-projects, and cloned UniSols. A journey of self discovery for John, punctuated by episodes of chaotic violence. The fight scenes in Reckoning are ungraceful and rough. The contenders are motivated by the prime directive of inflicting terminal bodily damage on each other. Over the course of reveals and stunts, we’ve detoured into an action film where the screenplay was retooled from a story of body horror by David Cronenberg. In a very short time John has gone from walking with a cane to participating in fights with a skill equal to that of his attackers. Fingers John lost in axe fight reappear just days later, fully functional. His speed, agility and endurance increase to incredible levels, enabling John to clear the last set of henchmen and to travel upriver, and down into a bunker to confront his personal Heart Of Darkness.
Day Of Reckoning didn’t do as well financially as the first Universal Soldier, and the same fate befell Regeneration. You can make an argument that misleading marketing put people off from seeing the movies. Placing JCVD and Dolph’s faces big and prominently in the posters, and then making Scott a tiny figure showing us his back in the foreground, when what we saw was the opposite, might upset fans of the franchise. To show JCVD, the former hero of the first entry, as the sadistic leader of an underground army of genetic freaks whose only pleasures are fighting and fucking, definitely put off fans that get misty-eyed over the first one. If you were a kid when you first saw Universal Soldier and made JCVD a part of your pantheon of personal heroes, you’d be repelled at this current version of Deveraux. Dead-eyed, with his face painted in a pattern not unlike Colonel Kurtz, Deveraux now embodies the madness that his commanding officer (Dolph) gave in to, the same madness that overcomes certain soldiers under prolonged combat.
Day Of Reckoning is an action movie set in a world of an encroaching psychopathic army. We see very few civilians, and they scatter quickly when the violence explodes from the calm. It’s an unforgiving world, without a love to defend, without the friendships and sense of duty that motivate the hero of standard action films. What we have here are discarded heroes, an aggregate of trained killers bound together by homicidal drives, and their leader is the former hero of this franchise. We’re in a world where we can only apply the Criteria of the effective action film through a distorted filter. If you can’t remember this Criteria, the Primary one is:
Does the story’s structure and pacing place increasing demands on the protagonist’s abilities, forcing him to expand his skillset by engaging both his mind and body in the process?
Yes! Our “hero” starts as a neutral with zero knowledge of the gathering hidden army. After the home invasion and assault his strength, agility and fighting skills increase in proportion to his growing awareness of what he’s involved with. John goes from a passive victim to active participant to central figure with a personal agenda. Which takes us to the Secondary Criteria:
Does the antagonist succeed in placing increasing demands on the protagonist, forcing him to increase his skill set and resourcefulness?
Absolutely! Deveraux and his army take John to the abyss, from which it takes John 9 months to recover. And to continue getting answers to his questions John has to put himself in harm’s way, only to discover that he’s very capable of not only deflecting violence, but dishing it out in equal or greater measure. We’re in the position of having to redefine what a hero is. John is a hero in the same way that Mike Hammer is a hero operating with a strict code, and not very different from Jack Reacher. The times are different, but they’re all operating with a code that was put on paper, arguably, in 1929 with Red Harvest and the Continental Op.
Day Of Reckoning takes cinematic risks. From the sudden plot twists, to the psychotic violence, disconnected from any good intentions, to the eerie score, Reckoning will jolt you into paying attention. If you’ve gone numb from too many action movies assembled from an AI plot generator, you need to the see this movie.
A teaser dropped on Christmas Eve, 2020 for an action project that felt warm and strangely familiar as it featured some standout Die Hard traits.
Firstly, dropping on Christmas Eve out of the blue like Hans’ detonators was one pen plunge on the Die Hard bingo card and secondly, we noted the actual words of the Tweet: “It’s 10:00am on Christmas Eve in Tokyo. Some Habits Die Hard… Old Habits Die Harder.”
Why is this significant? Because acclaimed Die Hard 6 screenplay, ‘Old Habits Die Hard’, is set in Tokyo.
Three Tweeters, who we’ll get to in a moment, posted the teaser trailer simultaneously with the exact same wording.
This ‘Old Habits’ appears to be a fusion of three exciting beasts of action. A combination of the ‘Old Habits Die Hard’ screenplay, the novel ‘Old Habits’ and the unfortunately shelved 2007 ‘McClane: Die Hard 24/7’ television show set in the 70s; all written by British writer Ben Trebilcook.
Despite the holidays, we reached out to Trebilcook to ask him about that show and a couple of other questions on Old Habits.
UAMC: The ‘McClane: Die Hard 24/7’ show sounds interesting. Are you able to tell us a little more about that? You wrote it in 2007, is that right?
Ben Trebilcook: I did. Friends back then worked at Fox’s FX Channel. FX had some great shows and I was in their offices a lot. I had a few meetings with their lead guys about a show I had written, called ‘McClane’, then it changed to ‘McClane: Die Hard 24/7’.It centered around a young John McClane, when he became a New York Police Officer in 1977, looking into his family and how he met his wife, Holly, with a backdrop of what was happening in New York and around the world at the time and with an opening and closing narration, hoped to be voiced by Bruce Willis. Over time we developed it and we agreed it was ahead of its time. Some believed McClane shouldn’t be a hero as a rookie cop, which is absolutely true, he shouldn’t and wasn’t. It was pitched back then as NYPD Blue meets the Wonder Years with an action set piece in each show, but not necessarily featuring the McClane character.
UAMC: Did any other characters from Die Hard feature in it?
Ben Trebilcook: Holly, of course and we had a young Samuel L Jackson starting his electronics business and what made him the man he was. There was an episode with a very young Argyle, too. I’ve family and friends in the New York Police and they helped me a great deal.
UAMC: What happened to it?
Ben Trebilcook: Good question. It should have been pushed. It went to a few heads in the US and in Europe. It would still make a great show. The first episode was set during the frightening blackout of 1977. Every crime imaginable took place that night and McClane was in the middle of it. A lot of that episode ended up in my Old Habits novel.
UAMC: Who was discussed as a young McClane back then?
Ben Trebilcook: Devon Sawa and Ben Mackenzie.
UAMC: So, a recap on the Old Habits Die Hard script. It’s has John McClane being invited to Tokyo by the Nakatomi Corporation to commend him for his bravery of the first movie, is that right?
Ben Trebilcook: Pretty much.
UAMC: And he takes Zeus Carver with him?
Ben Trebilcook: Yes.
UAMC: That makes sense. I mean, you go through a traumatic time together. I could see them remaining in contact. From other movie chat shows, we know other characters make appearances and that there’s a ton of yakuza, too, right?
Ben Trebilcook: It’s of course a homage to the first, but also my love of Far East action movies, especially from Hong Kong, Japan, Vietnam and Korea. It’s set in a smart building at Nakatomi Grand Plaza. A Westerner like McClane couldn’t be any more of a fish out of water, the customs and culture, the technology and weapons. It’s full on action. It was set for the thirtieth anniversary, but he could be commended for the 35th or fortieth. The older McClane is, the more reluctant he’d be, the more reluctant, the higher the stakes and increase of stress. He has to do what he feels is right.
UAMC: So, that script became an original novel in Old Habits?
Ben Trebilcook: Yes. There’s a few reasons it had to get out there quick, in book form, hence a few editing errors in some formats. The German version (Sterben Langsam) is great, however, ironically.
UAMC: And what are you able to tell me about ‘Old Habits’?
Ben Trebilcook: Well, a wonderful producer and director called Brian Trainor called me up and asked if anyone was attached to my book and if he could do something with it. I said there’s nobody attached, but if you’re going to do something, look up a great actor called Jeremy Sande first. Brian was aware of Jeremy and the three of us struck up a great friendship and I let them do whatever they wanted to do.
UAMC: The McClane show would be a good Disney + show for them now. Thanks for your time and we wish you a happy 2021.
Ben Trebilcook: Thanks, guys. Happy trails, to you.
And so, Old Habits, has Joe Brady walking his first beat as a New York Cop during the NYC blackout of 1977. Forward 40 years and he, like McClane, from the Die Hard Six script, goes to Tokyo with Janus (Zeus) and encounters just about every type of crazy from the criminal underworld; from low level thug, to bikers and oyabun yakuza bosses. Throw in a couple of familiar Europeans hellbent on revenge and you’ve got yourself one hell of an action vehicle.
We’ve learnt over the years from other articles on Trebilcook’s Die Hard script that the Grubers returnin the guise of ‘grandpa’ Frederick Gruber, the father of Hans and Philip Gruber, the son of Hans. Trebilcook stated once that Schwarzenegger would be a great villain, but who could be the son of Hans?
Ranking the best hand grenade scenes in ultimate action movie history!
Hand grenades are a great means to crank up the mayhem level in action movies. Always readily available to both good and bad guys, a thrown hand grenade creates excitement every time, as the delay before the explosion opens up all sort of avenues for things to go not as planned, and usually having someone die a horrible death. We’ve compiled the 10 best clips involving hand grenades from great action movies to honor this handy instrument of small-scale destruction.
A great flick with many insane action scenes and an impressive performance by Salma Hayek, the movie is all about Everly defending her family and herself from relentless attacks by the Yakuza. The next attack wave on her apartment starts with a mobster and his killer dog who really likes to play catch. And after bringing her daughter and mother temporarily to safety, Everly has a very special welcome for an elevator filled with gang members.
Part of Mel Gibson’s rehabilitation trajectory in Hollywood, Get The Gringo is a funny and action-packed film with Gibson back at the top of his game. In this particular scene, “The Gringo” lures crime boss Fowler (whom he was hired to kill) to a business meeting with a rich industrial. While he could have chosen any weapon to dispose of Fowler, he decides to take him out in style, big time.
One reason bad guys usually tend be on the losing end in action movies is their disregard for even the simplest of rules. One of them is don’t load your car full of hand grenades when going on a car chase! Shadow Company boss McAllister learns this lesson after his driver is shot by Murtaugh. The car derails, crashes with a bus, and McAllister spends the last seconds of his life agonizingly staring at his stack of grenades.
This French action thriller is not stingy with creative and ultraviolent ways to dispose of its characters. One of them is a frantic car chase between the Dobermann gang and a motorized police officer. While brawling through a lowered car window, he gets a hand grenade stuffed into his helmet. His explosive demise is commented by the lunatic priest Elie: “He just entered the paradise of the headless.”
Words can hardly describe the old-school action inferno that this movie is. Tango & Cash assault the armed fortress of crime lord Perret, and his henchman Requin appears holding Tango’s sister Katherine hostage. A brief, but awesome fight begins, and we are reminded of why you should tighten your belt when your opponent brings a hand grenade to a fist-fight.
Outnumbered and unarmed, Jet Li’s character Liu hides in the laundry room of a hotel from his opponents in one of the many bonkers scenes of this martial arts action classic. After breaking down the door, police chief Richard shows us how he likes to treat his employees. He kills one of them who refuses to go after Liu, pushes another one into the laundry chute, and uses a third as a human shield against a bounced back grenade.
Starship Troopers is another controversial Paul Verhoeven classic, but no one in their right mind will debate the awesomeness of its action scenes. Totalitarian poster boy Johnny Rico gives his own meaning to the phrase “It’s what’s inside that matters” when he takes on the giant tanker bug and its flaming acid dispenser.
Robocop is the greatest action movie of all time, and Clarence Boddicker possibly the most bad-ass movie villain of all time. On behalf of OCP vice-president Dick Jones he pays a visit to Bob Morton, who is running the Robocop project. Morton celebrates the first successful deployment of his creation with some “models” and nose candy, when Boddicker knocks on his door. What happens next is movie history.
During the showdown of John Woo’s and Van Damme action masterpiece hand grenades are flying left and right, and we have two great clips for you. Van Damme plays Chance Boudreaux, and his confrontation with main villain #1 Pik Van Cleef is action movie perfection, you need to see it for yourself. And for his fight with main villain #2 Emil Fouchon we are treated with another iteration of the “don’t wear loose pants to a hand grenade fight” rule.
The honor of creating the ultimate hand grenade moment goes to Rutger Hauer and Gene Simmons. After beating up terrorist Malak, who also killed his girlfriend, bounty hunter Nick Randall shoves a hand grenade into his adversaries’ mouth to get his compliance. He takes him to the police but decides to skip out his bounty just this one time and rather see Malak’s head explode.
One Tough Bastard is oozing with ultimate 80s action nostalgia!
I don’t know about you guys, but I feel like I’m starting to get over this whole 80s nostalgia thing. I love the 80s, especially 80s action movies like the rest of y’all, but what gets me down is all the 80s throwback ventures. I’m not gonna name any names, but some of these projects seem to exist primarily just to reference 80s action movies, with no story of their own to tell. And quite frankly, it’s becoming increasingly annoying with every new one that gets released.
But then, something comes along that rejuvenates my love for it all. Something that encapsulates the right amount of love and passion for the genre, then adds the right level of over the top, as well as having its own story to tell.
Shane Moxie: A washed-up 80s action star who refuses to believe his best days are behind him…
Duke: A hyper-intelligent chimpanzee and arguably the greatest animal actor of his generation…
SYNOPSIS: Reunited for an anniversary movie screening, when Moxie and Duke are targeted by assassins, the feuding co-stars reluctantly join forces to terminate with extreme prejudice an organized crime syndicate headed by an iconic German action star dealing death from his movie-themed fast food franchise.
Yes. You really just read that. This is the type of stuff that gives me life! Seriously, I live for this type of stuff! If you’re a fan of 80s action, but with its own spin on things, you need to give One Tough Bastard a look! Available for pre-order now! Links down below!
From Adam Howe, writer of Die Dog or Eat the Hatchet and Tijuana Donkey Showdown, and the winner of Stephen King’s On Writing contest, comes a ‘buddy’ comedy in the tradition of Lethal Weapon, 48 Hours, and Tango & Cash, and a love letter to the gory glory days of 80s/90s action cinema. One Tough Bastard will turn you into a goddamn sexual tyrannosaurus… just like its author.
AUTHOR’S STATEMENT
One Tough Bastard is a fist-bump to 80s/90s action movies, especially those of Joel Silver, whose work (Lethal Weapon, Die Hard, Predator, Roadhouse) made a big impression on me as a kid; mixed with the kind of ‘Big Dumb Comedies’ Hollywood used to make without fear of causing offense. This is the Ready Player One for action movie fans, filled with Easter eggs from your favorite action flicks. The lead character – I hesitate to use the word ‘hero’ – Shane Moxie (aka The Mox) is a fusion of Kenny Powers, Steven Seagal, and Jack Burton from Big Trouble in Little China; a legend in his own mind, and a magnet for trouble. With the characters of Moxie and his chimpanzee partner, Duke, I riffed on the dynamic between Jack Burton and Wang in Big Trouble, a blowhard ‘hero’ and his more capable ‘sidekick,’ leaving the reader to decide which of the two is the book’s eponymous “tough bastard.”
While the book is first and foremost an action/comedy, and reads like the kind of movie we only wish Hollywood still made, through the character of Moxie, a man out of time, struggling to navigate the “Woke” modern world, I was able to filter much of the insanity of the late twenty-teens… and given all the crazy shit going on in this “Clown World,” is it really so hard to believe that a washed-up ’80s action star and a chimpanzee could save America?
SHANE MOXIE BIOGRAPHY
Shane Moxie was born in Toad Suck, Arkansas, the lovechild of a waffle waitress and the town hellraiser. Reared on a hard-R diet of action movies and kung fu flicks, Moxie trained himself to expert level in the martial arts – all of them – and developed his own devastating fighting style. According to Moxie’s own legend, after winning the kumite, Moxie served with distinction in several elite combat units (no record exists of his service, presumably for national security reasons). With nothing left to prove, the self-styled underground fighting champion, and decorated Special Forces hero, hit Hollywood. Moxie exploded onto movie screens with 1988’s One Tough Hombre, a redneck Rocky-with-feet rip-off that became the sleeper hit of the summer box office. An overnight star, Moxie was signed by Universal to a multi-picture deal, releasing a string of hits including Amishing in Action, Gung Ho-Ho-Ho, American Sumo, and Lambadass. Moxie’s career reached its zenith with 1997’s Copsicle, a caveman cop ‘buddy’ comedy in which Moxie costarred with arguably the greatest animal actor of his generation, Duke; Moxie’s bitter rivalry with his chimpanzee co-star would become the stuff of Hollywood legend. Copsicle was a box office smash; had Moxie made better career choices, he might have enjoyed the longevity of Schwarzenegger and Stallone, and be remembered fondly today. Instead, a combination of bad press caused by his feud with Duke, substance abuse, an unprovoked assault on American Ninja actor Michael Dudikoff, and his next motion picture, the notorious KKKop, would destroy Moxie’s career. After KKKop provoked nationwide civil unrest, Moxie’s contract with Universal was terminated; he was blacklisted by the major movie studios, and cast into the Hollywood wilderness.
Today, Moxie periodically appears in Direct to Video motion pictures (most recently Mosquitosaur vs. Crabshark for SyFy), and reality television (Celebrity Rehab), while waiting patiently for Sylvester Stallone to cast him in the next Expendables movie, from which he hopes to launch his eagerly awaited comeback. If Sly is reading this, Moxie can be reached at 555-7617.
SELECTED FILMOGRAPHY:
GUNG HO-HO-HO
He’ll Blow-Ho-Ho You Away
(dir. Craig R. Baxley, 1993)
Donnie Womack, a traumatized veteran of the US invasion of Grenada, atoning for his sins as a Salvation Army Santa, is the only hope for hostages being held by terrorists in a strip mall supermarket on Christmas Eve. Another in the plethora of Die Hard rip-offs, and an ironic fixture on Best Christmas Movie lists, if parent groups were incensed by slasher-Santa flick Silent Night, Deadly Night, nothing could have prepared them for the yuletide ultra-violence of Gung Ho-Ho-Ho. Highlights include a tortoise-paced mobility scooter chase through the supermarket; Moxie punching out a reindeer; and a graphic love scene between Moxie and a shellshocked checkout girl. A mooted sequel, Hanukkarnage, was hastily shelved after screen tests were leaked of Moxie wearing shtreimel and tallit and a prosthetic nose.
AMERICAN SUMO
Japan Just Got Nuked Again!
(dir. Mark L. Lester, 1995)
In his ongoing battle with phencyclidine addiction, which became public knowledge in the wake of his unprovoked nightclub assault on fellow action star Michael Dudikoff, Moxie had piled on the pounds. Sensitive about his weight gain, he claimed to be a Method actor in preparation for his next role; American Sumo was hastily developed to support this falsehood. To avenge the murder of his Interpol agent brother, competitive eating champion ‘Fat’ Chance McColl travels to Japan and infiltrates a Yakuza-run death-sumo syndicate. The scene in which Moxie battles a giant animatronic octopus at a tentacle- pornography studio, obliterating the Kraken-sized cephalopod with a hand grenade, followed by the quip, “You’re calamari, motherfucker,” is a RiffTrax classic, and a perennial favorite among trash film connoisseurs.
COPSICLE
Pre-history’s toughest cops
Blasted from the past to save the 90s!
(dir. John Landis, 1997)
48 Hrs meets Encino Man… Preserved for centuries in a block of ice, caveman cop Stone, and his chimpanzee partner Boo, are thawed from their icy tomb to apprehend their nemesis, Thugg, a Neanderthal drug dealer of narcotic pterodactyl guano, who is wreaking havoc in modern-day NYC. Comic high jinks ensue as the caveman cops struggle to adapt to the politically correct 1990s.
A huge summer blockbuster, and Moxie’s biggest hit, stories of Moxie’s feud with his chimpanzee co-star Duke have become the stuff of Hollywood legend. Critic Roger Ebert wrote of Copsicle: “Witnessing Moxie flounder through the role he was born to play – a caveman – one can only sympathize with his simian co-star. Mr. Duke carries Moxie’s considerable deadweight, anchoring the picture with a remarkable debut performance, and a shoo-in come awards season, which deserves so much better than this otherwise formulaic dreck.”
The good lord blessed us with an ultimate b-movie action angel with the great Wings Hauser 🙌 😇
Far be it from me to use an emoji when describing an ultimate 90s action movie, but I’ll be damned if Wings Hauser doesn’t warrant a smiley face halo for his work knocking out ultimate b-movie action hits over the years.
Best known to many as a character actor, or often bad guy or bully, over decades of television work and spot film appearances, Wings has a remarkable talent for onscreen scene chewing in any role. However, where the man really shines is in his self-directed b-movie action vehicles like the 1990 classic Living to Die.
Oh man, is this ever a Wings MF-ing Hauer film. We get our man as a retired cop/detective guy or something quickly set up in an opening bust gone wrong number. Or something like that, I was as distracted as Wings’ character Nick Carpenter was casually hitting on his lady partner. Regardless, we arrive in Las Vegas where Wings is cast in the middle of a weird world of drugs, prostitution and all the neo-noir criss-crossing of characters and allegencies that you’d find in Chinatown.
Wings does his part though sifting through the many leads, turns and women as he roughs up various characters, kicks plenty of butt and downs as many whiskey neats (water backs) as possible. Overall the film actually works quite well with Wings offering a surprisingly deft hand at directorship. Some shots and sequences drag a bit, but for a film where you can see the budget play out at times with actors and sets, it’s actually a quite impressive job done.
But what really makes the film great are all the character actors babyyyyyy! Led by Wings’ uncanny ability to make a MEAL out of any scene he’s in, the rest of the cast seems to relish the opportunity to play up against his oozy confident charisma and takes their turns at ramping up the ACTING! I say this in caps because you can tell when an actor is really GOING FOR IT in terms of how quiet, loud or explosive they can be.
Wings, for example, can turn a casual scene of, hmm you know: picking up a payphone and asking for a number. And turn it into this beautiful 5-minute masterclass into how to do as much screenwork as possible, yelling to a non-existent bartender in the back, coughing up a lung for dramatic effect, then finding his light and positioning himself into some renaissance art pose to take the most casual of phone conversations.
We also get a huge ensemble cast of women who undoubtedly Wings had hand-cast in each role from his personal Hollywood friend groups with the promises of making them into stars… And as seedy as that might sound today, you could argue that he at least delivers the goods because there are some great roles in this film as the women show off a surprising amount of diversity and range from a full improvised dance number to a classy songstress that could have led off any scene in Goodfellas.
That’s just the acting though, and odd as it may be for me to recommend a film just on acting, I’d actually have to do it for Wings’ performances alone. However, luckily, there is a very respectable amount of action as well. Wings is not one to hold a punch should it come up in any scene. And working as a hired gun of sorts, he certainly knows how to play the tough guy and rough up a few figures to put the story together.
There’s also the aforementioned big action set at the beginning with several fisticuffs and minor shootouts sprinkled throughout. However, if you’re looking for Arnold or Chuck Norris level action you might be a bit left out. This is a Wings movie baby, and like it or not he’s gonna get his screentime with his acting and with his ladies. He saves the action for key scenes where a butt needs to be kicked before he can kick back with another whiskey neat and wax poetic on life – Wings style!
Ranking the most ultimate action movies of the great director Robert Rodriguez!
Robert Rodriguez is hands-down one of the masters of modern action movies, and it was about time we had a closer at his work that is spanning more than two decades by now. He entered the movie arena around the same time as his buddy and long-time collaborator Quentin Tarantino. And just like him, Rodriguez distilled the essence of classic B-movies and waltzed over them with his own vision for adrenaline-charged spectacle.
Massive shootouts and explosions, lightly clad women, and cool lines by the minute have become his trademarks. For almost all his productions he was in full creative control, which enabled him to create some of the most uncompromising films to ever come out of big studios in Hollywood. In this article we will discuss and rank his ultimate entries to the action genre.
Alita: Battle Angel marks a strange outlier in Rodriguez’ cinematography. It is completely devoid of his trademarks, and we can only speculate if he was allowed any say in the creative process, or had to concede to producer and writer James Cameron. The amnesiac android Alita is salvaged from a dump and repaired by the engineer Dyson. Alita realizes that she has incredible physical powers, and her fighting prowess does not go unnoticed by sinister forces, who try to capture her.
After almost 40 years of cyberpunk cinema, films like Alita: Battle Angel just don’t make the cut anymore. Unless you’re 12 years old, and watch a Sci-Fi movie for the first time in your life, then it will blow you away. The movie is a generic cyberpunk thriller with some teen drama elements, featuring a CGI-created main character, whose animation is everything but convincing. Sure, there’s plenty of action, and everything looks pretty expensive. But that doesn’t save Alita from being a bland and sterile affair, and I’ll choose Albert Pyun’s Nemesis anytime over it for a kick-ass flick about a cyborg with an identity crisis.
Robert Rodriguez returned to Sin City once more, and treated us with three other stories from the mind of Frank Miller about a daring gambler, a careless private detective, and a vengeful stripper. Rodriguez’ applauded black and white imagery that brings Miller’s stories to life is back, and it looks even better due to a special effects upgrade. Compared to the first part the characters and stories may be slightly less exciting, but it’s all good enough to be worth a watch.
Mickey Rourke reprises his iconic role as bad-ass brawler Marv, and the movie also the last appearance the late and great Powers Boothe (Red Dawn, Sudden Death) on the big screen. Sin City: A Dame To Kill For stays completely true to the style and spirit of the original, and that’s a really good thing in my book. It may not be the last iteration of the comic book on film, a TV series apparently is in the making, with Rodriguez and Miller in creative control.
Machete Don’t text, Machete don’t tweet, Machete Kills! Danny Trejo is back as legendary warrior Machete. While the first movie was already an explosion of action and slapstick humor, Machete Kills is in overdrive mode every minute. This time Rodriguez takes on cheesy spy movies from the past, and as usual he knows how to convert the template into something awesome. Machete is hired by the US president to find a terrorist aiming a nuclear missile at Washington. On his search, he faces trigger-happy prostitutes, a many-faced assassin, and a clone army of martial arts warriors.
Machete Kills bears all the trademarks of the first movie, but this time it seems Rodriguez didn’t care to pull together a cohesive plot, and just wanted to have fun with crazy action. And there are indeed many glorious moments such as Machete hanging on a rotating helicopter blade while chopping off his enemies heads. Maybe the jokes and timing are a little less spot on than in the first part, but it’s still Machete killing people in the most absurd and violent ways, and making love to every woman he comes across. Machete Kills is another blast from Rodriguez, and we’re all looking out for Machete Kills Again – In Space!
El Mariachi returns for his third adventure, and for the sequel to Desperado, Rodriguez went big with everything. The action is more spectacular, the sets are more lavish, and the special effects are more crazy than in the original. El Mariachi is hired by the CIA to kill his arch enemy Mexican general Marquez, who himself pursues a murderous plot with the help of a drug lord and his buffoons. Antonio Banderas is great as always, Mickey Rourke impresses with his Chihuahua, but their performance takes a backseat to Johnny Depp as eccentric CIA agent with an incredibly wacky performance, or maybe he’s just being himself.
El Mariachi’s weaponized guitar also got an upgrade, this time it comes with a flamethrower and a remote-controlled exploding version. Once Upon A Time in Mexico is a bit chaotic and messy at times, but again full of explosive energy and impossible action scenes to make it another Rodriguez classic!
Zombies, strippers and toxic chemicals! Rodriguez’ spoof of cheesy Sci-Fi horror movies from the past became another instant classic. A cloud of poison gas is released from a research facility, and turns the people of the neighboring town into zombies. The surviving villagers must not only fend off the zombies, but also a rogue squad of mutant soldiers. Planet Terror perfectly recreates the style of American and Italian low-budget horror flick (including fake reel wear), and is an all-out assault on your nerves with shootouts, explosions and Helicopter blades chopping up hordes of mutant soldiers.
Things are spiced up further with massive amounts of blood and goo that are poured over the protagonists. It’s all good fun, though, as there’s plenty of slapstick humor to take the edge off many disgusting scenes. I can almost guarantee that you will laugh out loud to even the most violent kills, that are usually accompanied by cheesy one liners (“I’m gonna eat your brains, and gain your knowledge.”). Rodriguez again presents us some unforgettable characters, such as Bone Shack Diner owner J.T. (played by Jeff Fahey) on his search for the ultimate ingredient to his BBQ sauce (guess what it is?). Planet Terror is tasteless, absurd and sexy, a perfect movie!
Danny Trejo’s role as Machete secured him everlasting cult status among action movie fans. The ultraviolent slapstick humor from Planet Terror continues in Machete, this time in an action movie template. Mexican Federal agent Machete is betrayed during an operation, and left for dead. Some years later, being an illegal immigrant to the US, he is hired to kill Texas State Senator John McLaughlin (Robert DeNiro). Things go terribly wrong, of course, and Machete needs to free himself from the web that his enemies are spinning around him.
Machete is a charming bad-ass that calmly eats a burrito while crushing an opponent in a fistfight, and is also pretty good at escaping through windows using his opponents intestines as a rope. He cuts everyone to pieces who gets in his way, and makes love to every woman he comes across. Despite its crazy escapades Machete has a fairly solid plot that centers around the well-known problems occurring at the US American/Mexican border, and does not shy away from taking sides. As an additional highlight, Rodriguez managed to cast Steven Seagal as a villain! Even in his role as a Mexican druglord (with a terrible Spanish accent) he sticks to his usual combination of stoicism and arrogance, but his weird performance only adds to the insanity of the film. Machete is a riot of a movie that is destined to become an ultimate classic!
Marvel and DC behold, this is how you do a comic book adaptation! Granted, Frank Miller’s opus magnum is not exactly a family-friendly template, but Rodriguez and Miller’s collaboration leaves every other comic book movie in the dust big time. Sin City features three intertwined stories from Miller’s works, tales from the most hellish place on earth that show us an assembly of broken heroes, corrupt cops, and hookers armed to the teeth. A masterpiece of aesthetics and storytelling, the choice of re-enacting almost every image from the comic one by one into movie scenes is certainly eccentric, and in a way the most orthodox approach one can imagine, but it works incredibly well!
The crime/noir setting is visualized by Rodriguez in stunning high-contrast black-and-white images with occasional sprinkles of color. Bruce Willis, Mickey Rourke and Clive Owen all portray hard-boiled, disillusioned characters trying to do just one single good thing in a cruel and cynical world. The action is brutal and vicious with people being shot, stabbed and disemboweled countless times. Stylish, violent and ultracool, Sin City is a film for the ages.
“Everybody be cool! You, be cool!” If you really liked liked Pulp Fiction but thought it was too chatty and didn’t have enough thrills, you have found your new favorite flick. The criminal Gecko brothers are trying to escape to Mexico and leave a trail of bodies in their wake. On their way, they take a preacher and his kids hostage. When the group stops at the Titty Twister bar just across the border they’re in for a monstrous surprise. From Dusk Till Dawn set a new standard for insanity on celluloid that was copied countless times, and rarely matched. What one may think is a foul-mouthed and violent crime road movie turns into a hysterical splatter action comedy.
The movie breaks itself into two halves with a crazy twist, and literally all hell breaks loose when the longest and goriest bar fight in movie history starts. The term cult movie is overused, but this is one of them. From Dusk Till Dawn is pure genius, and cemented Rodriguez’ status as specialist for outrageous action spectacles. He also created the pretty awesome TV series From Dusk Till Dawn that you should check out if you can’t get enough of the Gecko brothers’ escapades.
The movie that started it all. Almost, because the movie that really started it for Rodriguez was El Mariachi, a zero-budget flick that got Hollywood interested in his work. With its sequel Desperado, he created a template that he would adapt and refine in many of his later productions. The movie tells an archetypal Western story in a present-day Mexican town. El Mariachi seeks revenge for the death of his lover, and shoots everyone and everything to pieces in the process. The story is paper-thin, but Rodriguez tells it with a lot of pathos and characters one starts to care for despite all of them being cliched and one-dimensional. Antonio Banderas and Salma Hayek are an incredibly charismatic and energetic couple, and their performance in Desperado opened the doors for them in Hollywood.
What pushes the movie into ultimate greatness are its action sequences. They’re not extremely bloody, but still some of the best-looking shootouts ever created, with a beautiful style that blends elements of Spaghetti Western showdowns and John Woo’s Gun Fu. On top of that Rodriguez accomplishes them with razor-sharp editing, one of the best I’ve ever seen in a Hollywood movie. Desperado is as cool as a movie can get, a monument to Rodriguez’ talent and one of the classics of modern action cinema.
In Soviet Russia, buddy cop crime thrillers solve you!
There’s something just oddly, yet endlessly, charming to Arnold Schwarzenegger movies. Is it his curt Austrian accent that shines through every raspy syllable that he utters? Is it his statuesque cut and posture that protrudes from any costume or silly hat? Or is it his charming on screen personality that shines through even when cast as a no-nonsense Russian cop who barely breaks a smile all film.
I think it’s just that, in any action movie situation, Arnold’s magnetism and star power just shines through. And while Red Heat might not be a perfect movie, it’s obvious that it’s Arnold’s film as he carries the full weight of the buddy cop actioner despite the best – and solid – efforts of gritty crime director Walter Hill and the wisecracking James Belushi.
Let’s start with the beginning. And what a beginning it is! We’re introduced to Arnold as Moscow Militia Captain Ivan Danko and we’re quickly informed that Arnold is really going to go for it in terms of speaking broken and heavily accented Russian for the entire film. We also get a ridiculously glorious combination of scenes where Arnold infiltrates a homoerotic underground combo workout room / bathhouse – which is mostly filled with naked powerlifting men with a few scantly clad ladies to balance things out.
Arnold, the fittest of them all, walks in and is quickly ambushed into a boxing match that explodes out of the walls and into the cold Serbian landscape as the two naked men wrestle in the snow. And that’s only half of the intro!
We also get Arnold going into his Russian detective mode channeling all his inner Steven Seagal as he also walks into a lion’s den Hungarian bar to rough up and toss down some thugs in a means to bust bad guy Viktor Rostavili (Gabor Koncz). Arnold breaks off a cocaine-hiding fake leg before eventually losing his mark who eventually makes his way to the US where his path crosses with James Belushi’s Chicago detective Art Ridzik.
And while the crux of the film is on this buddy cop relationship between the emotionless Russian-Arnold and the softer, wise-crackier James Belushi, it’s really Arnold’s movie through and through. I’ve never been a big James Belushi fan, but never really disliked him or anything like that either. And this movie just continues that for me. He’s there. He’s got some OK jokes but for the most part they’re the same and not quite delivered with any real authenticity to really land.
However, he really doesn’t have to do much as everything he does is juxtaposed against Arnold and his performance as Ivan Danko. Walter Hill, to his credit as well does his best to recreate the on-screen dynamics between Eddie Murphy and Nick Nolte from 48 Hrs. but perhaps what he didn’t quite count on was just how powerful Arnold is once he’s on screen.
Even with a muted down character who mostly is stuck to shortly spoken one-liners in response to Belushi’s constant badgering it’s still his movie and ultimately his journey to take down Rostavili.
I’d say that most ultimate action movies of this era are guilty of going one of two directions in terms of their best action sequences. They either shoot their load and start off with too much – sometimes all – of their fireworks at the beginning, or they start too slow and save up everything for the end. I think Red Heat actually has one of hte best openings to any of Arnold’s films as it’s just pure awesome sauce to watch Arnold do his Russian cop thing solo.
However, Hill is a great director and despite some script inconsistency there is plenty of action sprinkled throughout that mixes nicely with the plot and general buddy cop police work that the duo must accomplish. The film finishes with a climatic bus chase of all things (because how does Arnold fit into a car really?) which does deliver the goods and is a nice wrap up to a not-perfect, but perfectly enjoyable buddy cop action romp.
The third installment of the action sci-fi series might be a franchise best!
Who would’ve thought we’d be here? Seriously, when Skyline premiered in November of 2010, who could’ve guessed that we’d be here, 10 years later, anticipating the release of the third film in the series as much as we have? Not I. When the first film came out, I wrote it off as a dull, forgettable, low budget alien invasion flick. But then, something weird happened. We got a direct to video sequel in 2017 starring Frank Grillo and Iko Uwais called Beyond Skyline. Obviously, I’m a fan of both men, so I had to check it out, regardless of how I felt about the original. And… it was AWESOME!
Yep, completely blew me away. Now, the third film is upon us, cleverly titled Skylin3s. And I’m super excited. Especially since this one has Daniel Bernhardt in it. But, will it continue on from the previous entry in awesomeness, or will it be as flat as the original? Let’s find out!
When a virus threatens to turn the now earth-dwelling friendly alien hybrids against humans, Captain Rose Corley must lead a team of elite mercenaries on a mission to the alien world in order to save what’s left of humanity.
Ladies and Gentlemen, I can 100% confirm that not only is Skylin3s great, but it is definitely the best one yet! This movie is 100 megatons of pure fun! I had a great time! Let me break down why:
First up, the cast is great. Lindsay Morgan is a firecracker in the lead role of Rose, who we saw as a child in the previous entry. She is such a badass! Definitely worthy of being the Ellen Ripley of our generation. Everyone else is on point. Alexander Siddiq, Jonathan Howard, Giedre Mockeliunaite, Cha-Lee Yoon, and genre favorites James Cosmo and Rhona Mitra all provide awesome performances all around. Special shoutout to Jeremy Fitzgerald, who played Trent, or the guy in the Trent suit. I know acting in those big, heavy, special makeup effects suits must be tough, so kudos to him for being amazing with all that stuff on.
But the MVP award of the cast must go to one of the biggest badasses ever, Mr. Daniel Bernhardt. Dude has always been a favorite of mine since I was a kid, so whenever he pops up in something, I get real giddy. I know a few people were disappointed that Grillo nor Uwais returned for this installment, but I found that to be an acceptable loss. You know why? Because this one had Daniel Bernhardt. And, like always, he comes through in spades once again. Another great performance in a long line of great performances, Bernhardt lights up the screen whenever he’s on it. Bravo, Mr. Bernhardt. Bravo, indeed.
But what about the action? The action is tops! Director Liam O’Donnell and the awesome people over at Reel Deal Action have crafted a full on rollercoaster ride of thrills, giving us everything from gunfights, spaceship fights, human vs human fights, alien vs human fights, and alien vs alien fights galore! So whatever your poison is, this one has got you covered!
Any gripes? Just one. The movie took a liiiittle too long to let Bernhardt show what he’s made of. Bernhardt is an exceptional martial artist, and I’m always happy to see him go to work. So as the movie progressed, I began to worry, because he hadn’t fought yet. But don’t worry, he gets 2 fight scenes later on, and they’re both fantastic. So it was all well worth the wait in the end. Still would’ve liked to have seen a fight earlier in the movie, but it is what it is.
But all in all, this was a damn good time. I had loads of fun with it, and for action fans, this is just what the doctor ordered. Bring on Skyline 4!!!
Because who doesn’t want to sprinkle their holiday cheer with some badass revenge action!
The ghost of Charles Bronson wafts over Peppermint (2018) like smoke clearing the barrel of a freshly fired .32 revolver. The action-driven, revenge fantasy helmed by Taken (2008) director Pierre Morel and starring Jennifer Garner failed to impress critics but thrilled action fans with its vengeful violence and efficient narrative.
Curiously, in an era that champions films featuring strong, independent women kicking ass and fighting the system, Peppermint was ridiculed into virtual obscurity. Fortunately, Netflix recently picked it up and just in time for the holidays too. For those of us who celebrate the season with Die Hard and Invasion U.S.A., you can now add Peppermint to your Yuletide watchlist! It takes place on December 21st and features a festive backdrop for the on-screen carnage and mayhem.
After her husband and daughter are senselessly gunned down and the killers walk free after a sham trial, Garner’s Riley North goes full Batman Begins to learn the ways of the streets, familiarize herself with an assortment of firearms, and she even finds time to take up MMA on the side. She returns five years later to put her new skills and experiences to good use in the LA underworld. She also randomly jumps into action to motivate a drunken deadbeat dad to be a better father. It’s really a wholesome tale of self-improvement and social justice after a tragic loss.
Perhaps critics were rolling their eyes at another Death Wish wannabe as the Eli Roth remake premiered earlier that year and two John Wick movies had their nights under the neon glow. Maybe the depiction of a normal, loving mother in the first act didn’t align with their life experience. The bad guys were mostly –gasp– non-white cartel members and gangbangers, even though Riley North is ruthlessly equal opportunity with her brand of social and criminal justice.
Peppermint is an imperfect film but far too many critics couldn’t get past these offenses as they penned reviews from their fainting couches. It was just too needlessly violent and there couldn’t be sadistic gangs like MS-13 running around on our pristine inner-city streets. Off the couch and outside the bubble, these things exist and sometimes the justice system is woefully inadequate in dealing with them, which is why the film scored much better with the unwashed, movie-going masses. It scored a pathetic 12% on Rotten Tomatoes among the professional critics but the audience score is a much more realistic 71%.
After getting beyond the superficial problematic nonsense, there are legitimate narrative and character issues that hold it back from being truly ultimate. Even after years of mental and physical training, it’s still hard to believe what Mrs. North is able to do, like string up three thugs over twenty feet high on a Ferris wheel. We don’t even get to see much of her preparation for the fateful day that leads to about three dozen kills. Perhaps spending more time with her on this journey would round out her character. That time could’ve been borrowed from the hapless cops who miraculously, and almost immediately, figure out what’s going on despite being relatively useless for 90% of the runtime.
If you can close these gaps enough to take some leaps of logic, there is plenty of entertainment throughout 102 well-paced minutes of shotgun-fu, knife fights, and explosions. Pierre Morel shares an action style with other European directors of his kind; exhibiting a kind of beauty and finesse to the brutal violence. It’s a quasi-arthouse style but with the fun and excitement of a 90’s action classic, which makes for an enjoyable popcorn-fueled experience.
Compare the colorful, atmospheric shootout in Peppermint’s problematic piñata factory to Hard Target’s non-problematic Mardi Gras float factory. Riley North even properly executes a full-auto assault on the crime boss’ compound and takes the boss on mano-a-mano. Aside from these familiar tropes, North’s motivation is well-founded and Garner delivers an admirable performance that balances the fisticuffs with a believable femininity. Her motherly instincts are demonstrated throughout, which are central to her character despite her extreme transformation.
There are a few things to swipe at here and there but there are many more elements and ideas to embrace in Peppermint. I don’t think we’ll get a John Wick or Taken-style franchise but this woman-powered entry in the revenge action sub-genre deserves some more respect than it has received in the past two years. Hopefully, with it streaming on Netflix, Peppermint will find an audience, especially among those of us who appreciate a no-nonsense, action film with a heart and a brass-knuckled fist.
